It goes without saying that the subconscious mind is a slippery thing. Even the greatest scientific minds in the world are baffled by how it works, and what it means when it chooses to say anything.
Dreams are the window to the subconscious. They are the subconscious at play; running through information yet to be processed, already processed, and sometimes wholly fabricated, they can be frightening and occasionally frighteningly funny, or they can be surreal and wholly without any apparent meaning.
My dreams tend to shine a light on aspects of my own personality of which I might otherwise be unaware. I even have a couple of recurring dreams. Since this is not a magazine about the Living Dead, I'll avoid writing about that recurring dream and focus instead on the others.
I'm on an escalator going down. I seem to be in the lobby of a local hospital that doesn't have an escalator. It seems odd at first, but when you're me, you get used to oddness.
There's some kind of case in my hand. Could be a guitar case, could be a suitcase. Not a briefcase, though. Then I remember that I'm travelling and I'm actually in the local airport (which not only looks NOTHING like the hospital, it doesn't even have an escalator, either) going to catch my flight. Or did I just get off of my flight?
I can't quite remember. Something about a tour bus.
The tour bus had crashed... that's why I'm thinking of the hospital. Wow, I hope David's all right.
'David' is, of course, David Gilmour. How I know this and why I'm concerned about Mr. Gilmour are beyond me as I can see him at the bottom of the escalator with his entourage and he's clearly all right. Somewhere in the crowd, I can make out Nick Mason and Richard Wright.
It begins to dawn on me that I've stumbled across a Pink Floyd tour. It's a little disorientating because I still haven't figured out why I am travelling in the first place. Sometimes the beginning of a dream finds me sorting out who I am and where I'm at in my life, and I haven't quite gotten to that point in this dream yet.
You see, Pink Floyd have shown up and thrown me off my game.
I'm a little star struck on the escalator. Mere feet away from me are three gentlemen who have all influenced my own musicianship in some way. Will I summon the guts to try to say something to them, or will I totally clam up and just end up looking really sad?
Then, Mr. Gilmour looks up, makes eye contact with me... and grins, just a little. "There he is," he says, or words to that effect. As I step off the escalator, the entourage surrounds me and a barrage of information is conveyed. Yes, there was a bus wreck; no, none of the band were on at the time; yes, all concerned parties are fine. A new bus is being sent and we'll not lose any serious time from the itinerary.
Wow... I'm the second guitarist in Pink Floyd. This must be a dream.
That's usually when I wake up... or the dream changes, or whatever else happens now that I've shattered the illusion my subconscious mind had conjured up while I wasn't looking. So I never got to find out why Tim Renwick wasn't on the tour and how I had happened to come to fill in for him.
To be honest, though, at the time it didn't really matter. I was just jazzed at the notion. Just like the time my girlfriend and I were sitting on my parked car at the state fair eagerly poring over the tickets we had obtained for the Pink Floyd show which would begin shortly. (Pink Floyd at the local fair? On some levels, that qualifies as a Floydian nightmare, I think.)
Roger asks me if I fancy being the lead guitarist for the show? Yes, I fancy.
In this dream, the friends we had been waiting on arrived and called out to us, so we got off my car and we all walked down the midway. There was still some time before the show actually started, so we checked out the games, the rides, and the kids all having a blast with their cotton candy and lemonade. Locating the arcade tent, we killed some time on a couple of games of classic Donkey Kong, Zaxxon, and Berserk when the fireworks began, signalling the start of the Floyd show.
We ran along with the crowd to the performance area, which was intimate despite the size of the stage which was large enough to hold the entire touring band. With plenty of room should Gilmour suddenly decide to do a Townshend.
The place is still small enough and our seats are close enough to the stage that Gilmour, again, spots me and smiles. As he motions for me to come onstage, I see some techs pulling out gear for me to play through. Climbing the stairs at the side of the stage, I start going over guitar parts in my head to make sure I still know them.
Of course I know them. I could play them in my sleep.
As I strap the guitar on, I look at the set list and see that we're about to do "Comfortably Numb". Gilmour asks me, "Do you want to take the first solo?" Or something like that.
I nod, confidently. This guitar solo is ingrained in my DNA. The second solo, not so much... but close.
We play the song and again, the landscape and situation shifts so suddenly I don't even have time to notice it, and I'm off on a different adventure.
One night, I found myself in the stands of an arena with a great view of the stage on which The Wall was about to be performed. I had arrived early and gone straight to my seat so I could just drink it all in. I watched the other earlybirds milling about, going for popcorn and beer, or just visiting with each other.
Then, I see Roger Waters in his trademark silk suit and mirrored aviator shades, walking across the stage very casually. The show hasn't begun yet and he doesn't seem to be about to make an announcement of any sort; he's just sort of standing there with one hand on his forehead, scanning the room. He looks in my direction, nods his head in recognition and starts walking towards me. I watch him approach and wonder what he could possibly have to say to me. Apparently, there's some kind of trouble. He says what it is, but I can't understand the words... I get the gist of it, though. He asks me if I'm game to pitch in.
Of course I'm game to pitch in.
Soon, I'm dangling by bungee cords from a hydraulic lift. I've got a hard hat on and I'm somehow aiming the lights at specific areas of the sides of the wall by bouncing back and forth on the cords. Roger watches me, adding comments as they occur to him. I become aware that the crowd is filling in and realize that showtime is pretty soon. Fortunately, all of the kinks are ironed out and the show is ready to go on.
Roger expresses his appreciation for my help and asks me if I fancy being the lead guitarist for the show?
Yes, I fancy.
At another Wall show, I was already onstage, just waiting for the curtain to go up and the show to begin. However, I do recall that the Schoolmaster puppet was hanging where the Mother puppet should have been. This was easily fixed, though, by simply mentioning it into the headset microphone I was wearing so that I could also keep in touch with the technical crew while I played.
These dreams have never puzzled me the way dreams normally do. There's really nothing enigmatic in them. I'd love to be the secondary guitarist in Pink Floyd. I'd love to stage a production of The Wall and play lead guitar in the pit band. It's all pretty much your basic wish-fulfillment fantasy.
I just think it's cool how even my subconscious mind is as impartial in the PF split as I am--I even dream in both camps.
Sean Ellis is a staff writer for Spare Bricks.